“Selfhelp was the cause she cared about most,” says David Siegler of his mother, Ilse.
The Siegler family has long been attached to The Selfhelp Home. As residents, as volunteers, and as donors, they are no strangers to Selfhelp’s hallways. This lifelong relationship turned to a legacy when Ilse Siegler passed away in December 2024 and she bequeathed a donation to Selfhelp.
We sat down with her sons, David and Bob, to understand the Siegler family’s connection with our facility.
Bob and David have nothing but great things to say about the time they’ve spent here—which includes visiting grandparents and even Shiva for their mother. But you may be surprised to learn that, despite Ilse’s connection and commitment to Selfhelp, she was never a resident here.
But as a Holocaust survivor, Ilse understood the meaning of finding home in a new place.
Separated from her parents for several years as a refugee, she lived with a family in Michigan while her parents established themselves in Chicago. When she was finally reunited with them, she became a registered nurse and worked at Weiss Memorial Hospital, just down the street from Selfhelp.
The Siegler connection to Selfhelp began with all four of Bob and David’s grandparents. Ilse’s parents, Irma and Julius, as well as their father’s parents, Minna and Jacob, called Selfhelp home starting in the late 1960s. With Ilse’s professional background and personal history, she had a deep understanding of what Selfhelp represented. Before long, the Siegler family found themselves immersed in the community.
Bob and David remember and cherish it as a very close-knit community. Bob credits the fact that Selfhelp was “really continuous” with the German-Jewish synagogue their grandparents attended, Temple Ezra.
“I think a very high percentage of the original people living at Selfhelp, and maybe 20 years afterward, already knew each other from the temple,” Bob explains. “They probably understood each other at a level that no one else could.”
They note how well the name “The Selfhelp Home” suits our facility and our mission.
“These German-Jewish immigrants came to the US, and many of them were too old or too weak in English language proficiency to really make much money and support themselves,” Bob says. “And Selfhelp was an expression of the whole Jewish community of Chicago uniting to help these people—many of whom had been through hell during the Holocaust.”
“It was—and remains—a very friendly and dignified place for older people to live,” David adds. “And our grandparents really loved it.”
That love transferred to Ilse. Not only did Ilse leave a bequest to The Selfhelp Home, but she spent her time volunteering here working in the gift shop, leading discussion groups, serving on the social committee, and even conducting assessments for new residents.
In fact, Dorothy Becker tried recruiting Ilse to succeed her as Selfhelp’s administrator when it came time for her to step down. Bob and David agree that Ilse made the right decision turning down Dorothy’s recruitment.
“It would have been very, very difficult to live up to Dorothy,” Bob says. “She just devoted her whole life to it, don’t you agree?”
“I agree 100%,” David says, nodding emphatically.
David and Bob said their mother spoke fondly about Selfhelp through her final days.
Because for the Siegler family, Selfhelp became more than a place where their grandparents lived. It became home.
“Selfhelp was a real community … There was no us and them, we’re all one community.”
When Ilse passed at the end of 2024, she was set to be buried in Chicago. Despite the fact that none of the large extended Siegler family lives in Chicago anymore—they’re scattered across the states, including California, New York, and Atlanta—there was no question where they would gather for Ilse’s Shiva: Selfhelp.
“It was a sign of how good it was [here],” David says. “I would say that the vast majority of people went up to the podium [during Shiva] and talked about all their awesome memories of Ilse, and I thought that was such a nice tribute to Selfhelp, and Ilse’s life of course.”
The brothers agree that’s a rare feat considering how scared people are of public speaking. But that’s the impact Ilse had on our community.
Thank you, Ilse, for your years of service and support. Thank you to the entire Siegler family for making Selfhelp part of your legacy.
And to all the children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren who gathered here for Shiva—please know that Selfhelp will always be your home away from home. We welcome you to stay connected to this place that meant so much to Ilse, and we hope you’ll continue to be part of our extended family for generations to come.